I Went To Heaven. It's in Sheffield

It all started many months ago. We were at a pub in Sheffield, UK when a group of girls in school uniforms and mini skirts entered. We wondered who was the pervert who designed such uniform. We assumed they just came from a graduation ceremony or something of that sort. We forgot that incident in the pub and summer in Sheffield was again as blue as it had always been.

Two weeks ago in Sheffield we went out to look for a place to have a drink. We found a nice place, many students, not too crowded. We went in and had whiskey. Slowly, one after the other, started entering the pub 18 y/o girls wearing police-officer uniforms with ranks, hats and mini skirts. We were amused. We envied the people of Sheffield for having such good spirit.

This week we also had a couple of nights to kill in Sheffield. We decided to go to the same pub again, one of the busiest pubs in Sheffield. And there again our eyes caught the most jolly sight of groups of girls, wearing angels' clothes with wings and mini-skirts. It all became clear. Those girls we saw months ago in school uniform, the police officers: There ought to be some costume party here every week. But how can it be? Last week we were here on Monday and today is Tuesday. An angel wearing a mini-skirt passed by and distracted us, we stopped discussing the issue.

On Wednesday we wondered what were the odds. We were at three evenings out of three so far. We went to the pub. How disappointed we were to find a pub full of men watching a football match. Double was our disappointment when a blackboard painted in chalk said it was a Kareoki night. Disappointed, we poured ourselves a beer and sat down. At 20:30 we decided to call it a night and were about to go back to the hotel. And just as we were set to leave, like a fairy tale, entered a group of twenty girls, all red, Santa hats and, as is usual in these places under the heaven, red mini-skirts. OMG! Four out of four! In an instant the cold weather outside was forgotten, home sickness was gone. Heaven is here!

The spirit of the English is good. It reminded me of the spirit of the people of Jerusalem and perhaps all suburbia's people. Happy people who go out to have a good time. I recall a party in Jerusalem when everybody came to enjoy themselves, not to see and be seen. For a Tel-Aviver this was quite a site. Christmas spirit in Sheffield only enhanced the joy of the party people. When Kareoki started this spirit blew over us and filled us with joy too.

I'll try to pass a bit of this joy to you. Imagine twenty girls like the one in the picture below joining in their high voices to the chorus of the song below. I put the Kareoki version of the song so you can join in singing. Fun is guaranteed.

Yoooouuuuu Baby!!!!

It used to be hell but Sheffield looks great since discovering the Cavendish.

Places I liked in London

I spent the weekend in London. Better than Sheffield... I found some places I should get back to:

1. Edgeware Road - "Little Lebanon" where you can get a decent dish of reasonably priced Hummus.

2. Brick Lane - "Little Bangladesh", lots of Bengal restaurants, cool atmosphere, good food. I was lucky because there was the Brick Lane festival* but it looks like a nice place to have dinner any time of year.

3. Old Street - Pubs etc.

4. Konstam - a little coffee shop in King's Cross on the way between the train station and the Holiday Inn. A cool little place to have breakfast.

(*This post was translated from Hebrew and was originally posted in September when the Brick Lane festival takes place)

It's easier to give up in e-mail

I won't lie to you. I also dumped girls in e-mail. It's easier and, after only three dates common courtesy doesn't dictate other behavior. My pain is for she never even said 'no'. It looks like she gave up. It was easier for her to run away, to forget.

And why is it so painful after only three dates? Well, that's the whole point. It's painful because after three dates it hurts and that's not a common thing.

I'm in Sheffield, UK. Sky was dark today as appropriate for English weather. And good for that. I don't know how I would deal with the pleasant European sun in such a day. In the afternoon the skies were red with frustration. Yes, frustration. It's all very frustrating. Forecast for the weekend is rain. I hope they miss the forecast because I don't feel like crying.

And I told her that I don't write about personal stuff in my blog...

She wants to be alone

She wants to be alone. I understand her. It scares me too. You go to work in the morning, in the evening you get back to your fortress of solitude, eat whatever you want, watch whatever you want on TV. Master of your domain. You go for a stroll in the streets, go to friends. Then you got out with whoever you want or just stay home to read a book. Having someone else to consider is not easy. In this town you're never alone but it's easy to forget that you're lonely.

Men are Mice in a Labyrinth

Men never grow up. Men remain children until they die. As the years go by men seemingly become mature. We're mice in a labyrinth. We only want the cheese. We walk around, sniff. We think we're close so we put our hand on her lap. Bzzzzz!!! Electric shock. We're back at the beginning of the labyrinth. Sniffing. This is a dead end. We've been here before. It looks like we're almost there. We almost reach out for the cheese but then we remember we were electrified here. So we find a way around. There - we found the cheese. A moment before we taste it we take a glance at another girl. Bzzzz!!! Electric shock. We have to start the labyrinth again. We know the way by now. We know how to get to the cheese but we didn't get a bite yet. We talk, pretend to be listening, we even compliment about your hairdo. And finally we bite the cheese. The day after, we're back at the beginning of the labyrinth, running to the cheese. We reached the cheese. We know how to bite it. But we didn't call the day after. Bzzzzz!!!! Electric shock.

"- I really gained a lot of weight". "- yeah, you should go on a diet". Bzzzz!!!!
"- Let's get a movie and a bottle of wine and stay home, just the two of us". "- Sure! We'll do that tomorrow. I'm watching football with the guys tonight". Bzzzz!!!!

And so, slowly but surely, we learn the secrets of life. We don't understand it. We don't approve of it. We're more experienced. Not more mature.

About Marriage and Coffee

Why is it that when people get married they stop going out and start inviting people over to their place? A couple of my friend invited another couple of friends over for dinner tonight. Another friend of mine was invited to a couple of friends for evening coffee and cake. I think the married people think: We're bored to death and we're to lazy to do anything about it. So come over and amuse us. I don't have anything in particular against meeting in homes (although I prefer the pub or a cafe). But it appears to be consistent that marriage somehow change the entertainment preferences of people. It's an approach like "we're married already. we're no longer children who go out to pubs".

I don't understand it. I don't understand life in general.

What's better

It's better to be woken up by a phone call 3o minutes after you fell asleep than be woken up by a phone call 30 minutes before you were supposed to wake up.

It's better not to forget your mobile phone in the taxi. Not all taxi drivers will answer it when you call to ask them to bring it back.

Who's sexy?

I love Israel. I really do. If not that crap we have to deal with Israel could be a great country. That's why I occasionally go to Europe. Forget about all that shit. Sometimes I feel like enough is enough. And in Europe you don't have those problems. That's the beauty of Europe. As you may have figured out by now, I'm talking about sizes. In Israel the size of shirts begins with XXL, and pants are always for people over 1.80m. In Europe it just doesn't happen. Israel is a racist country that discriminates the short and the thin. So today I bought a shirt. And it wasn't even expensive. I got change from a hundred.

"At least finish the meat!"

Once upon a time the English lived on an island and all they had to eat was potatoes and fish. Then they conquered the world. China, Africa, the Middle East, Asia. The empire where the sun never sets. In England there are at least two cooking shows aired at any given time. So how come that the only food they adopted was the Hamburger? How come the only food you can get today in England is Fish and Chips, Sausage Roll and Hamburger?

I'm in Sheffield again, the city that never wakes up. At seven o'clock in the evening, just before they turn off the lights, I went out to find something to eat. I don't want no Hamburger or Fish and Chips. So I was lucky to find a pub that serves Chilli con Carne. I was glad to find it and ordered one (stressing out the fact that I don't want any sour cream with it, of course). And there came the food. A decent dish with meat, rice and nachos. I wasn't very hungry but I had to eat because there won't be any food later and I'd have no one to blame. Because I was not very hungry I told my self - "forget about the nachos and rice - finish the meat at least". Do you
know that saying? It usually comes out of your Dad's mouth. "Finish the meat, at least". When did meat get the honor? Why is meat better than rice? Or vegetables? "Just finish the patty" of the burger. "So take some meat balls with the potatoe". Hey! It's just meat! And I actually heard meat is murder.

Of Course Israel Lost

It is now clear that we lost the war. I don't know if we lost it in military terms but it doesn't really matter. Because the purporse of the army is to serve the political goals of the state. Politically, we lost big time.

Lebanon was taken 20 years back in infrastructure. It also made a long way back in internal politics. It is now again a very fragile society.

In Israel, public opinion has gone 20 years back. It will take 20 more years until Israeli public will allow pullouts from occupied land. 20 more years of pain and blood are expected here until we understand again that occupation doesn't get us anywhere and contributes nothing to our security. And this is despite the fact that the current war showed that the when we pull out we get the world backup going on a defensive war. This war showed again that rockets and missiles do not pose an existential thread on Israel. Israel cannot be defeted by rockets.

Before the war, Hizballa was in sterss. Lebanon was growing rapidly because it was going west. It was becoming modern and it did it good. Before the war broke, Hizballa was losing the fight against the west. So it provoked Israel. And Israel fell for it. Now again, the Lebanese are afraid of the west, Hizballa is the savior and, any chance of reaching peace with Israel in the Middle East has taken a step back. This is what Hizballa wanted and this is what they got. That's why Hizballa won.

Hotel Showers are Better

Hotel showers are better. Hotel showers are really clean. And snow white. In hotel showers the taps shine. The towels are soft and folded nicely. When you wash in a hotel shower it feels like a first time. It feels like something new. You use more soap in a hotel shower. And hotter water and stronger stream. In hotels you take more baths. The hotel shower is an escape.

Like a Hemingway Novel

I've been in Sheffield, UK in the past two weeks. Business trip. I'll probably be here next week too. Loneliness, work, alcohol, Victorian hotel, bar on the ground floor, high, decorated ceiling, heavy wooden furniture, maroon leather armchairs, dark, thick carpeting, brass chandeliers. Journey. Like a Hemingway novel.

It sounds wonderful. It sucks. In the past, when people told me business trips were no fun, I found it hard to understand.

Come Autumn

Autumn will be better. In autumn the war will end. In autumn work will be less stressful. In autumn I'll have a girlfriend. In autumn everybody's health will be good. In autumn. Come, autumn.

I feel like going to sleep and waking up in the autumn. This summer shouldn't have been.

Thoughts from the UK

I was in the UK last week. In fact, I just landed this morning and I'm flying out again tomorrow afternoon. We're doing business in Sheffield, so I have to be there.

I was surprised to see how much the British media covers the Israel-Lebanon conflict. It's in the headlines all the time. I was even more surprised to find Sky News' coverage very unbalanced. I didn't try BBC because I know that will drive me crazy. The BBC is very pro-Arab in all aspects, not only in the current conflict.

I really wanted to get back to Israel when I was there. Usually I don't mind seeing new places and traveling alone. But with the current war, I felt the need to be close to the ones dear to me. The pain I feel from the war is different in the UK. When I'm there, the pain is more national than personal. I managed to forget for a while about my cousin and friends fighting in the front, about my brother's family taking refuge in central Israel. It's not that I really forgot about them. But from the distance it's less troubling. I still called my friend every day to see how he was. I still talked to my mother and kept suggesting that my brother moves into my flat while I'm away.

But to the relief in stress from the war joined new stress - from work. Being the front end of your company against the customers is always stressful. You need to get used to it. And I am getting used to it. It's still very stressful, but not as bad as the first day when I really felt sick.

I take things too personally. Work, politics. I really need to get over this. Just live my simple life.

I had more thoughts from the UK, but I'll keep some of them for next week. I'll try to report from Sheffield. I really don't feel like going there again tomorrow, but it's a phase in our company's life when I just can't say no.

War is delightful to those who have not experienced it

Sorrow. Pain. I want to cry. I want to sob. My brother is a refugee, my cousin is in the front and my best friend is going there Sunday.

Stupid are those who think Israelis want war. Stupid are those who think Israelis are warmongers. You won't see in Israel pictures like the ones from before the World Wars. There will be no French recruits smiling. No Belgian women willfully sending their sons to fight the enemy. You'll only see tears.

Today, just as my friend was telling me that he was called for reserve duty, my phone rang. It was my cousin. He's on the border with Lebanon. I asked him not to be brave. "When they ask for volunteers - take a step back". I asked him to keep asking questions. Ask why. Ask what's the point. Ask when it will end. I guess what I asked him was simply to stay alive and stay a human being.

Oh, how I hate war.

War is delightful to those who have not experienced it.
(Erasmus)

Yearning

Years ago, when people went on a long trip, a neighbour or friend would get milk and bread and put it in their home. So they have something to eat and drink when they're back. Those were times when people who asked for directions to a friend's house actually wrote them down and memorized them. In those times people who set an appointment would show up in time. And if someone was delayed, they would wait there. The wouldn't go wandering around. And when they met, people would actually listen to each other. In those times you'd have a room prepared for unexpected guests, just in case someone drops by from a far city. Times when people rang the doorbell, not the phone. You were excited the first time you looked at the photos you sent for printing.

Those were times when not everything was instant, immediete. Words still had a meaning. Those were times when you could think before you do. Those were times of consideration. Times of patience. Those were times when you could still be surprized, you could still get away. You could still forget.

Tel-Aviv During the War

The first days in Tel-Aviv were hard. We were all frustrated. But now, life is back to normal. It's all "business as usual". Last night there was the Opera in the Park. They played Verdi's "Rigoletto". Thousands of Tel-Avivians came to watch the free event - a full production of the famous opera. It was easy to forget about the war while listening to "La Donna e mobile".

People in Tel-Aviv laugh, smile. People in Tel-Aviv go on dates, go to the movies, go to restaurants. I've just come back from the pub.

But there is something below the surface. Something bad, dark. We try to ignore the war. We try to escape it. But it's there. It's haunting us. The way we drive the car, the way we talk, the way we lose our temper. The war is in us all. That's why we hate it.

Interesting

Here is an interesting dialog with Wafa Sultan, an Arab-American psychologist from Los Angeles. She's talking about a different war. A bigger war. A war of which we are just a battle.

Dialog from Al-Jazeera TV:
http://switch3.castup.net/cunet/gm.asp?ai=214&ar=1050wmv&ak=null

Set to full screen to see the subtitles.

See You After the War

I don't see the point of this war anymore. As I've mentioned before, this war should have ended a week ago and focus should have been set to the diplomatic efforts. In the past week the army showed no achievements. Certainly not achievements that were worth the lives of the soldiers who died.

I don't understand why the army keeps bombing roads and civilian targets. I thought the blockade was set in the second day of fighting. So why are they still bombing? Revenge? We revenged already. Every day that goes by makes the Hizballa forget how surprised they were. The Lebanese get used to live at war (again) and forget why it broke. Our political achievements are getting farther and farther away. We should have negotiated when they were still in shock. We lose more and more points. Had a week ago our politicians gone negotiating, we would have had the upper hand. With every day that passes our case gets weaker and weaker.

And now they are talking about going all the way to Tyre. Why? Even the army admits that force alone will not stop Hizballa. So we'll go into Tyre. Our soldiers will die. Their people will die. Do our leaders ever think ahead? Or are they still dozed by the smell of war?

I read the news like a butterfly flies into fire. In our country you don't read the news. You don't listen to the news. In Israel, like with drugs, you do the news. It's addictive, and you do it even though you hate it. I stop it. I don't want to hear anymore. In 2002 it worked. I decided I'll apply the same on the current stupidity that's growing bigger by the day. Let me know when we're out of Lebanon.

How Wars Break

Here's a dialog from the great book "All Quiet on the Western Front" by Erich Maria Remarque.
(This quote is actually from the movie, I couldn't find the text from the book to quote, but it's pretty much the same)

Tjaden: Well, how do they start a war?

Soldier #1: Well, one country offends another.

Tjaden: How could one country offend another? You mean there's a mountain over in Germany gets mad at a field over in France?

Soldier #1: Well, stupid. One people offends another.

Tjaden: Oh, that's it. I shouldn't be here at all. I don't feel offended.

Katczinsky: It don't apply to tramps like you.

Tjaden: Good. Then I can be going home right away...The Kaiser and me...Me and the Kaiser felt just alike about this war. We didn't neither of us want any war, so I'm going home. He's there already.

Soldier #1: Somebody must have wanted it. Maybe it was the English. No, I don't want to shoot any Englishman. I never saw one 'til I came up here. And I suppose most of them never saw a German 'til they came up here. No, I'm sure they weren't asked about it.

Soldier #2: Well, it must be doing somebody some good.

Tjaden: Not me and the Kaiser.

Soldier #1: I think maybe the Kaiser wanted a war.

Tjaden: You leave us out of this.

Katczinsky: I don't see that. The Kaiser's got everything he needs.

Soldier #1: Well, he never had a war before. Every full-grown Emperor needs one war to make him famous. Why, that's history.

Paul: Yeah, Generals too. They need war.

Soldier #3: And manufacturers. They get rich.

Soldier #1: Nobody wants it in particular. And then all at once, here it is. We didn't want it. The English didn't want it. And here we are fighting.

Katczinsky: I'll tell ya how it should all be done. Whenever there's a big war comin' on, you should rope off a big field.

Soldier #1: And sell tickets.

Katczinsky: Yeah, and, and, on the big day, you should take all the kings and their cabinets and their generals, put them in the center dressed in their underpants and let 'em fight it out with clubs. The best country wins.

The Importance of Being a Gunner

I have just been informed that my cousin has been recruited for reserve duty. He's 23 y/o.

I told my Mom he was an artillery gunner, and therefore he should be relatively safe. Artillery is usually not in the front line.

But then I remembered he was transferred at some point. I think he's no longer a gunner. I am worried. It's past midnight. It's too late to call and find out where he's been located. There goes my goodnight's sleep. I'll have to wait until tomorrow.

In the meantime - it may sound selfish - God save my cousin.

Shoelaces in the 21st Century

Why do they still use shoelaces? It is so middle-ages!

- We have velcro.
- We have rubber.
- We have all new hi-tech materials.

Shoelaces?! Come on! Why do they still make shoes with shoelaces? I vowed not to buy another pair of shoes with shoelaces ever in my life. I call upon you to join me. The world must move forward. We must leave the past behind.

Same goes for stick-shift. When I go in the car, I want to go forward or backwards, fast or slow. It's the 21st century. Why do they still make stick-shift cars?

Shirt buttons, ties (were ties invented to hide the shirt buttons? how did the idea of a tie come up?).

I'm compiling a list of things the world should have gotten rid of long ago. I'd appreciate your thoughts and ideas.

And for those who insist here is a way to make things faster.

Israeli Refugees

Nobody is talking about the Israeli refugees. Some 1 million Israelis are now under fire. Fire targeted at them - the civillians. Those who could, tens of thousands of them, have found refuge in southern parts of Israel. They took their essentials and went south.

My brother is a refugee. He and his pregnant wife and their 2 y/o daughter fled from their home up north. They are now living at my parents'. My sister in law's two nefews are refugees. They also moved into my parents'.

My friend's mother is a refugee. She moved from a Kibbutz up north in the middle of the night. They couldn't stand the noise of bombing. My friend's mother insisted on washing the dishes before leaving. "I am not a refugee", she said. "Refugees don't wash dishes before they leave". And so, at 4:00am she started doing the dishes. Now she's staying with her daughter in a single room in Tel-Aviv, with two dogs and a cat. Yes, a dog and a cat were among the refugees.

Many Israeli families invited complete starngers to come live with them until the war is over. Israeli refugees are lucky to have good people to host them. So they have a roof to sleep under. Israeli refugees are lucky the Israeli economy is strong. So they have food to eat.

Those who had nowhere to leave - they are refugees in their own towns, their own homes. For two weeks they have to stay indoors, in underground shelters, not seeing the light of day. They have to keep alert to the sounds of sirens. So Israeli refugees are lucky they have shelters and authorities to take care of them.

Israeli refugees are lucky because their state and their fellow citizens take care of them. My heart goes for the Lebanese refugees who aren't as lucky.

But being a refugee is not only about not having a roof to sleep under. Being a refugee is not only about not having food. Being a refugee, above all, is being away from home. It is living in uncertainty about the future. It is not knowing what will be waiting for you when you get back home. If you'll still have a home to get back to. Being a refugee is a mental state of mind. In that sense, there are a million Israeli refugees.

My brother almost lost his mind. He wanted to go back. Fuck it all! Fire or not - he's going home. That's what being a refugee is.

Not a single report was aired around the world about the million Israeli refugees.

A Time for War and a Time for Peace

(Originally posted July 20th, 2006)

I think it's about time we finish the current war. We won't be able to destroy Hizballa, but I think the Lebanese people understand we mean business. They know they'll have to find a way to dismantle Hizballa.

Israel should begin intensive diplomatic efforts to stop the fighting and get our soldiers back. The world allows Israel to keep the fighting, no pressure yet.

But it's about time Israel stops acting according to "the world" and starts doing what's good for it. For once I would like to see Israel lead rather than being led. The same goes for negotiating peace talks with Hamas. So what if "the world" says Hamas should stop the violence and accept the quartet's demands? They can demand whatever they want. We're the ones paying for it. I want to see the Israeli government engaging into cease-fire (if not peace) talks with Hamas.

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to seek, and a time to lose;
a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to rend, and a time to sew;
a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate;
a time for war, and a time for peace.

(Ecclesiastes, 3, 1-8)

Lebanese Blogger

(Originally posted July 19th, 2006)

Here's a Lebanese blog. I find it interesting. Maybe you would too.

Anticipation

(Originally posted July 17th, 2006)

More and more people are asking when missiles will fall on Tel-Aviv. People bet on it.

"So do you think it's gonna happen tonight?"
"If it does, I'm staying in bed. Don't wake me up".

There's almost a feeling that people want missiles to fall on Tel-Aviv.

Sounds of War

(Originally posted July 16th, 2006)

Last week sucked in all fronts: I was jetlagged coming back from Arizona, there was a lot of work at the office, my uncle was in intensive care, and a war broke with Lebanon. I couldn't wait for the week to end and for a new week to begin. Well, today it started. My uncle is feeling better, the jetlag is behind me, at work there's still a lot to do, but the war is beginning to show results.

Music always helps in times of stress. I started the morning with Wagner's "Die Walküre" - ride of the valkyries. I couldn't stop myself from seeing the scene from "Apocalypse Now" where the american helicopters raid Vietnam. Only this time I imagined Israeli planes bombing Hizballa in Lebanon. And you know what? It made me feel better. Get the fuckers! I continued with Dvořák's 9th Symphony ("Aus der neue Welt" - from the new world). This piece also has an aggresive rythem, bigger than life. From there I moved to Beethoven's 4th and 5th. I ended with the raging music of Pixies' "Surfer Rosa". And voila! I felt great!

I'm one of those always protesting against Israeli actions in Palestine. Some Israelis would say I'm a traitor. I hate what we do there. But Lebanon?! We left there years ago. That's behind us. If the Lebanese government is not taking responsibility for what's happening there - we will.

As for civilian casualties - I never thought those were legitimate targets. And I know the IDF never targets civilians. But if a civilian allowed Hizballa to hide rockets in his back yard, or lives in proximity to Hizballa headquarters in Beirut - he must know the risks. And you know what? They say you can't count blood. Right now, the casualty count is approximately 10 Israelis and 100 Lebanese. Sounds reasonable to me - 1/10 ratio. The Lebanese must learn that they will pay the price. Punishment is part of it. I don't like it. I don't want them to pay that price. But we've had enough. For six years since the pullout Israel suffered occasional aggression from Lebanon and responded mildly just to show we respond. But sometimes enough is enough. Lebanon had six great years. They finally experienced economic growth, tourism. Now they learn that they have what to lose. I just hope they work hard so this doesn't happen again.

I have a feeling that the Lebanese people will make great neighbours when a peace is here. They appear to be very close in mentality to the Israeli people. They are held hostage by Hizballa. I hope that next winter we can go skiing in Lebanon.

A Genius

I just wanted to share with you readers a web site whose creator must be a genius. The idea is so brilliant that I can't stop smiling when I think about it.

Click here to have a good laugh.

Oh, how I love nonsense!

Friday afternoon, Tel-Aviv

(Originally posted July 14th, 2006)

Fridays are the best days in Tel-Aviv. Getting up late, going to the mall, the market, wandering in the streets with no special reason. Fridays are the days you sit with friends in the cafe, looking at the people go by in the streets, bumping into someone you know from the neighbourhood or just an old friend from school.

Friday afternoons are the most peaceful times in Tel-Aviv. You might even find a parking spot. On Friday afternoon the radio plays easy-listening music, oldies. Drinking cold lemonade and reading the weekend newspapers. That's Friday afternoon in Tel-Aviv.

Today, Friday afternoon is even more peaceful. The war that broke slowed down everything. Everybody's quite, everybody's thinking about how it's all going to end. Everybody is frustrated. Why do we deserve this? Why, after pulling out from Lebanon all the way to the last inch, should we deal with wars again? Why is it that even though we're out of Lebanon, even though we were attacked by Lebanon, why is it that the world still sees Israel as the aggressor? What should we do? Should we let the Lebanese keep shooting? Just let it go?

This Friday afternoon, we are all pensive.

This Friday afternoon is sad.

Auschwitz

(Originally posted June 18th, 2006)

Last week I woke up to a nightmare - I dreamed I was in Auschwitz when it was liberated by the allied forces. In the dream Auschwitz didn't look like Auschwitz, it looked more like Warsaw Ghetto.

I never had such dreams before. I wonder why I had it now. I believe it has to do with an e-mail I got last week. It shows a mock-up party invitation clip with images from Auschwitz. Some dutch guy thought it funny.

I am all for dark humor, and we in Israel often tell 'holocaust jokes'. But, for one thing, these jokes are easier to hear from Jews but not so funny when they come from others. Also, this one just had really bad taste to it. It really made me feel disgusted. You can see for yourselves here.

I don't know what to think of this incident (For the record, the guy who did it apologized and was sentenced to 40 hours of labour). I believe that it wasn't anti-semitism. I think it's just ignorance and incapacity to understand the past, the present, and hence the future. If people are unable to understand the sensitivity and significance of such horrors we shouldn't be surprized should such horrors happen again.

I believe that a second holocaust can happen. We've seen it happening in Rwanda, but it was easier for the west to accept (or rather, ignore), because it was third-world wars. I do believe that a holocaust can happen again in Europe or USA. Racism is widespread even the the most 'civilized' of nations. This is why I will never leave Israel. This is the only place where I can be me, rather than 'the Jew'.

The Iranian president's recent declerations calling for the destruction of Israel also make my mind work overtime.

It's quite amazing how the holocaust still haunts us, third generation to the holocaust. This might explain why so many Israelis fear our neighbouring Arab countries and refuse to give peace a chance (excuse the lame quote...).

I hope that when I have children I'd be able to pass to them some of the emotions that the holocaust rises in me. Yet, I would like them to know that a change can be made, that evil begets evil, and that people are not born evil.

Theory: Japanese are Aliens

Readers, I'd appreciate your comments on the theory that the Japanese are in fact aliens.

The arguments to support my theory are:

1. Japanese have eyes like in all the abduction testimonies (see image).
2. They live on a remote island.
3. Japanese don't laugh at the things we do, don't cry at things we do, don't eat the things we eat - they are different.
4. They are the most advanced technologically.
5. They are constantly documenting the earth - have you ever seen a japanese without a camera?

The Curious Incident of the Condom in the Night Time

(Originally posted April 14th, 2006)

How come it always happens to me? Remember that girl from last week? Throughout the week we exchanged one-line e-mails, saying nothing to each other. Yesterday I finally asked her where we're getting at, what's the point of these chats?

She gave the ultimate girl answer - 'where do you think we're getting at?'. I was honest and told her I thought we weren't a good match. But I also said she was very attractive (did a bit of lying there) and I'd certainly like to continue where we stopped last time. Her response surprized me - 'for some things we don't need to be a perfect match'.

And so she came over, we had a couple of drinks (us geeks need alchohol to get into bed, even when we both know where we're going). Then we got to bed, got the wheels into motion, the pumps pumping, the engines running etc.

But at some point I checked to make sure the condom was still there. It was not. Damn! We started looking for it on the bed in the darkness of my room. When this failed, we turned the lights on (which is, in a most ironic way, a real turn-off). It wasn't there. We couldn't find it anywhere.

It's happened to me before about five years ago. Being the expert in such cases I sent her to the toilets to look for it inside her. She came back with no results. But last time it happened the condom came out only two days(!) after the incident. She came back to bed. We didn't use another condom but found other ways of pleasing each other.

She left this morning. Around noon she sent me a message saying the lost was found. So now I need to hope she won't get pregnant and she's not HIV positive. Readers, please cross your fingers for me.

Good looking girls don't go to the gym

(Originally posted April 4th, 2006)

Today I realized that good looking girls never go to the gym. I mean, the really good looking. I know, I know. Now you're thinking 'I've seen many good looking girls in my gym'. Well, I hate to break the news to you. Those girls are not good looking by nature. They've been working hard to become good looking.

So what's wrong with that? Nothing, really. But it means they won't remain good looking. You'll pick them up at 20:00, you'll go to the cafe, have a light dinner, maybe a couple of drinks. Then one day she'll move in. You'll even go to the gym together every now and then. Then a weekend at her parents. Then you'll get engaged.

That's when your good looking girl will start working out really hard. She's got that wedding dress to fit into. She'd go on a 5 mile walk every day, sunny or rainy, freezing or hot. She'll get those weights and start walking. And you'll think you've the most beautiful girl in the world.

And then you'll put the ring on her finger. I now pronounce you man and wife. And then it's honeymoon. Well, you don't really expect her to work out in the honeymoon. She'll get back to the gym after the honeymoon.

But then you're moving to a new place. And there's just so much to do. Find the right house, get the right furniture, get the colors matched. She'll get back to the gym once you've moved to the new place.

Your new place is just great. But she's under so much stress, what with the new environment and all. She just can't get herself to go to the gym right now. She'd get acclimatized to the new life, give it a couple of months. Then she'll get back to the gym.

Now she's pregnant. And pregnant women don't go to the gym. After she gives labour. Then she's definitely going back to the gym.

Looks aren't everything. Just remember: The good looking girls don't go to the gym. They don't need it. They get the guys at the bar, why sweat?

Hello and Shalom (Goodbye, Yahoo!)

I started a blog in Yahoo! 360. But then I realized Yahoo! is going out of its way to force people to register in order to comment and read in my blog. So here I am, at the mother of all blog websites. I'll start by re-posting posts previously published in Yahoo!

The last couple of days were intensive in my blog. There is a war going on here, in Israel, so a lot of issues crossed my mind. Some I decided to share.

I hope you'll all enjoy my blog.

You're all welcome to comment, ask, tell.